A Political Ambition (and What Actually Happened)
‘Ambition can creep as well as soar.’ – Edmund Burke, Member of Parliament from 1765-1780.
A child’s ambition
When I was nine, I wanted to join the Army.
That’s because when I was nine, my parents moved the family to Wales and bought a house right next to an army range. Thousands of acres of wild, boggy moorland where the army practised manoeuvres, fired guns and drove tanks. It seemed so exciting! I dreamed of being in the Army for about two years. Whenever I heard gun shots, or loud booms echoing across the valley, I’d get a rush of adrenaline. There were jets too, and helicopters, and best of all, an assault course and a ‘model’ village. What could be better than joining the Army?!
When I look back at this, I smile to myself. If everyone did what they dreamed about when they were a kid, I suspect there would be an abundance of soldiers. There’d also be several thousand superheroes and hundreds of builders and postmen. Kids programmes are a real inspiration! And let’s not forget our sporting heroes, the legends whom we aspire to be when we’re small. When H was nine, she wanted to be a boy so she could play on the Welsh rugby team. Unfortunately, her dream never came true. She’s still female and playing on the Welsh men’s rugby team is still just an ambition. Maybe she could try the female team instead?
Growing up and going to university
As I grew older, I kind of lost my way, career- and ambition- wise. I have some ambitions, aims and goals, but they tend to be short-term. I work towards a future that I am not entirely sure of. Those dreams I held as a nine year old seem a distant memory. Occasionally, I almost long for the simplicity of childhood, so that I can once again hold my ambition of being in the army close!
I did my exams and decided to study Environmental Science at university. This is a typical example of my long-term aimlessness. I have no real longing to work in anything environmental in the future. Really, I should have stuck to my guns with my English A Level and studied English at university. However, Environmental Science it was. Off I went to Southampton to study for three years in a subject that I was never entirely sure about. I still look back on it and wonder why on earth I chose Environmental Science!
Don’t get me wrong, I loved uni. I made some amazing friends, learnt a hell of a lot and gained independence. There were heaps of transferable skills that I picked up. I even have some passion for the past 10,000 years, the Holocene, the ice ages, climate change and current environmental issues. Just not the real nitty-gritty, the details. I liked to know my subject in breadth, not depth, and it showed. I got a BSc 2:2 Honours degree. Although I was pretty pleased, I know I could have done better.
I still sometimes wonder what degree I could have gained if I’d done English instead. Would I have applied myself more? Worked harder to achieve better results? Or was it simply my age and personality traits that prevented me from reaching my full potential? Would I have still only have received a 2:2, be it with Honours? It’s impossible to tell.
Discovering politics
Until last year, I was lost. I didn’t have a clue what sort of career I wanted. All around me, my friends were becoming teachers, finishing tough degrees so that they could become cardiac physiologists or going off to travel the world in search of adventure and fun. And then, things changed.
I got an internship working for my local MP. During my internship, I discovered my passion for politics, for listening to people, for trying to help them, for the campaign trail, for standing up for something I believed was right. I found the world of Westminster and the House of Commons and there is no going back. Even a gruelling month’s worth of campaigning to get our AM re-elected didn’t deter me. And if that couldn’t, nothing can.
So here I am. I am now a Waste Project Officer and am putting my degree to use. However, my feet are well and truly submerged into the political world. I love anything and everything to do with politics. My MP is a true friend and I admire him hugely. I have made some fantastic friends within the Party. I am galvanised. My future feels, for the first time, to be clearer. I want to be a town councillor, county councillor, more… I love it all.
Looking back at my childhood ambition…
When I look back to my innocent nine year old self, I think how lucky it is that childhood ambitions don’t always come true. What did I know at that age? I would have been rubbish in the Army, truly terrible! It’s a good job that I grew up, lost my way and discovered my true enthusiasm for politics. And I laugh (not unkindly) at what might have happened if my friend had ended up on the rugby pitch… I think about other friends, the ones who knew from the age of nine that they wanted to be teachers or nurses or doctors. They’ve worked hard and their childhood ambitions came true for them.
It doesn’t matter how long it takes, whether you’re nine or nineteen or twenty two (as I am). Once you’ve discovered your calling in life, your one true ambition, you’ve really hit the jackpot. And it’s just great!
Postscript…
NB: This post was updated on 10th May 2020. I’m now thirty one and the growing up I did through my mid and late twenties was significant. It turns out that politics wasn’t really for me. Everything I’ve done was actually leading me down a different path.
Nowadays, I’m happy, settled and comfortable in my role as a project manager. I help the third sector, work closely with charities and I’m proud of my work. I’m good at my job and have a fulfilling and satisfying career. It’s funny how life turns out! How you can be so certain of something and just nine years later, look back and see how wrong you were… I wonder what I’ll be doing in another nine years?!
